TheLeadershipNotebook

Small Gestures, Big Impact

 

"We must not, in trying to think about how we can make a big difference,

ignore the small daily differences we can make which, over time,

add up to big differences that we often cannot foresee."

~Marion Wright Edelman

 

As I left my downtown office for lunch the other day, I flashed back to another summer day some 35 years ago that I remember like it was yesterday.

 

I was 20 years old and had my first “semi”-official job as an intern at what is now Ernst & Young. As the only woman “professional” on a staff of 50, it was just a bit overwhelming.  I was also on an extremely tight budget, needing every penny of internship earnings to get me back to the University of Cincinnati the next semester.

 

So you can understand why I packed a brown bag lunch each day and ate solo in the closest park.

 

After about two weeks of this, Jim Bachmann, the partner in charge of the recruiting program, called me into his office. My heart sank. “I thought I was doing really well,” I thought to myself as my anxiety rose with each step toward his office.

 

He began the conversation by acknowledging the quality of my work. (Big relief.) Then he asked me how I enjoyed working with all the other staff. I shared how everyone had been very friendly and helpful in teaching me the ropes in audit. 

 

“Great,” he said, then asked about my lunch routine. He must have seen me leaving each day with my lunch stuffed in my purse.  “Are you getting out with the team?”  “Well, not so much,” I replied.

 

And then he shared a piece of wisdom that has stuck with me to this day. “It’s just as important to forge relationships with the people you work with at lunch as it is during your work day.  It’s an integral part of your internship and I encourage you to make time for daily lunch with the group if you can.”

 

As I explained my tight budget, he pulled out a $20 bill from his wallet, saying, kindly, “This will help get you started.”

 

Beginning that day, I went out to lunch with the group at every possible opportunity. We talked about sports (remember it was me and the guys) and the latest happenings in the office and just got to know each other in a casual yet professional atmosphere.

 

I had the good fortune to return to the firm every other semester as I completed the UC internship program.  Six semesters later, I joined the professional staff in the Ernst office in Cleveland.

 

Ten years after that first summer, two of my former Ernst colleagues (and lunch companions) became my business partners in Toledo as we built another successful CPA firm. Today, they along with other former lunch buddies, are outstanding referral sources to my Executive Coaching firm.

 

I remember this story for several reasons.

 

First, it shows the incredible power of relationship-building and why it is a foundational skill for business success. Second, it was a piece of advice given at a crucial time in my own professional growth and development.  And finally, I’m reminded how a kind gesture – and a $20 bill – can have a value that is incalculable.

 

Jim Bachmann in one simple gesture taught me three powerful leadership lessons.

 

What about you? What is your experience with the value of relationship building? What is one piece of wisdom that you received at a crucial point in your professional life? What was the “small” yet powerful gesture that has made a difference in your career?

 

For me, I learned that day that it's the little things that really can make a BIG difference.

 

 

 

 

To your success,

 

Mary

 

 

Begin with the End in Mind

 

“The beginning is the most important part of the work.”

~Plato

 

My coaching client, “Joe,” was just promoted to a new role within his firm. He will lead a new division that includes some existing company employees as well as several new hires. This is a tremendous opportunity for Joe.

 

But in order to maximize his effectiveness and lay a firm foundation for the success of the team, I’ve encouraged Joe to begin with the end in mind. Joe must engage, align and inspire his team to achieve the goals and objectives that the division was formed to accomplish.

 

The process of integrating a new leader into a team is a great opportunity for the leader to share their vision, their priorities and their expectations for the group. It’s also an opportunity for the leader to learn more about each of their team members; what motivates them, what expectations they have for him/her as their leader.

 

This process helps establish trust, provide mutual understanding of issues and concerns, and improves productivity. All are imperatives for Joe in his new role. It can be used with experienced or inexperienced team leaders, and with existing or newly formed teams.

 

The process for integration can include a team offsite (useful for larger teams). This group approach accelerates integration because it gives everyone an opportunity to ask questions and hear answers at the same time, reducing ambiguity and misunderstanding.

 

It can also be accomplished in one on one meetings with each of the leader’s direct reports. The fundamental objective of both is to make sure that both the leader and the team members have an opportunity to learn about each other’s goals and expectations.

 

Regardless of the route you choose, here’s a sampling of some great questions that Joe should be prepared to answer:

 

Priorities

• What are your top priorities for the team?
• What do you want the team to accomplish?

 

Performance

• What do you expect of us?
• How will we (I) know if we are (I am) performing well?
• What is your definition of a top performer?

 

Leadership Style

• How do you handle conflict between team members?
• What are your own strengths and “less strong” points?

 

Background

• What did you do prior to becoming our team leader?
• What are a few key events in your career?

 

As I mentioned, the list is just a sampling. You get the idea.  

 

And in order for Joe to truly engage, align and inspire the team, he must take the opportunity to ask his team some questions. Here are a few good ones….

 

• What would you like me to know about you?
• What do you expect of me?
• What do you expect of me in addressing the priorities/issues and related problems?

 

Whether you utilize a new leader integration group offsite or a one-on-one process, leading a new team is a challenge but also an opportunity to get things started on the right foot. To begin with the end in mind.

 

We’ve got Joe’s meeting already scheduled.

 

 

To your success,

 

Mary

A Different Look at Leadership

 

"The function of leadership is to produce more leaders, not more followers."

~Ralph Nader

 

 

 

Meet Dip, Dot and their “dad,” Bill. I’ve seen Dip and Dot each summer when they travel from their home in Columbus, Ohio, to Catawba Island for their summer vacation.

 

Each evening, Dip and Dot follow their dad down to the lake to take their evening swim. Dip and Dot have “imprinted” onto Bill, who apparently was the first object they saw when they were born.

 

For me, watching Dip and Dot reminds me of the incredible responsibility we have as 
leaders. What leadership traits are we imprinting on our young professionals?  

 

Are we showing them what real leadership is all about? What type of leader are we creating in our organizations?

 

And here's a big one: Would your staff follow you anywhere?

 

Dip and Dot are so fun to watch as they head down for their evening swim. But the leadership traits we imprint and the cultures that we create in our organizations are no laughing matter.

 

To your success,

 

Mary

 

 

 

 

 

The Equation of Progress

 

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud

was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” 

~Anaïs Nin: 

 

Ten days ago I dove into the social media world of twitter (@CoachMaryWerner). So when I opened up my HBR daily blog feed yesterday, Whitney Johnson’s blog post titled: What Job Does Social Media Do For You? jumped right out at me.

 

What job did I hire twitter to do for me and my business, Werner Coaching & Consulting?

 

In the post, Johnson describes her own answer to that question through the jobs-to-be-done framework developed by Bob Moesta, a demand side innovator. “According to the jobs-to-be-done framework, whenever we buy something, we are hiring the product or service to do a “job,” the job being a problem we want to solve or a way to advance toward a better self.”

 

Hmmm. Sounds like the same can be said about changing behaviors as well—we change to solve a problem or advance toward a better self. My interest in the post moved from understanding the job that I hired twitter to do to Moesta’s “decision to buy framework” and how it applied to the work I do with change. And so I read on.

 

It turns out Moesta’s framework has four basic forces:

Forces of Progress:

F1= Push of the situation (e.g. frustration, what you’re doing now isn’t working and you are ready to change)

F2= Pull of a new solution (e.g. the pull or draw of something new or better)

 

Forces of Hindrances:

F3= Allegiance to the past (e.g. comfort of the known or history)   

F4= Anxiety around the new solution (e.g. anxiety or fear of the new solution, know-how, cost)

 

Moesta says “when we hire a product or service, it’s because the push (F1) + pull (F2) > allegiance to past (F3) + anxiety (F4). No matter how frustrated we are with our current situation or how enticing a new product is, if the forces of progress don’t outweigh the hindering forces, we won’t even try.”

 

Moesta calls it THE EQUATION OF PROGRESS.

 

Turns out my clients (or their sponsors who send them my way), look through a similar framework when deciding to change their own self limiting behaviors.

 

Clearly, many of them are pushed or frustrated (F1). Their behaviors hold them back from success (e.g. lack of interpersonal skills, leadership effectiveness, self awareness, self confidence, strategic thinking, communication, etc.)  

 

Many are pulled (F2) to coaching and change by a desire to excel, to continuously improve themselves and their performance. They seek an independent thought partner to help them accelerate their success.

 

My client’s feel that the push and pull of their desired change (more effective leadership, improved self confidence) outweighs their need to maintain the status quo (F3) and the anxiety (F4) that comes from seeking the solution. Thus the Equation of Progress in action.

 

Going back to my original question….What job did I hire twitter to do?

 

Whitney Johnson framed her decisions regarding “hiring” various social media tools through this jobs-to-be-done framework.

 

For me, I was pushed (F1) with the desire to continue to grow my coaching and consulting business and pulled (F2) to twitter as another vehicle to spread my passion to help leaders grow. (And truth be told, my sister, Elizabeth, is a big proponent of twitter).

 

I did not resist the change (F3) (change is a part of my everyday world) and I had little or no anxiety (F4) except for the extra time I would need to commit to be active with a twitter account. For me the push and the pull outweighed the resistance to change and fear of the solution.

 

Moesta’s framework is a great tool to help you evaluate the merits of a “decision to buy” but it can also help you evaluate your desire to change your self-limiting behaviors in a whole new way.

 

Is your F1 (push) + F2 (pull) > F3 (allegiance to the past) + F4 (anxiety)?

 

What do you think? What’s your experience with change? When has the push and pull been greater than the anxiety and resistance to change? Would love to hear your thoughts and feedback.

 

To your success,

 

Mary