TheLeadershipNotebook

FlexAbility: A Key Skill for Leadership and Living

 

Excellent leadership requires an ability to adjust your emotions, thoughts and behaviors to changing conditions.  And flexible people can move off their positions, and comfortably change their minds when new evidence suggests that they are mistaken. In other words, flexibility is a critical leadership skill in our current environment.

The skill of flexibility enables leaders to:

• Solve new and different problems they’ve not faced before
• Shift strategies and priorities when new situations arise
• Empower others, and let them know their ideas and input are valued

Some Strategies for Improving Flexibility

• A key to flexibility is self-awareness. Look at a period of time, (a day, a week) and jot down situations where flexibility has been a challenge, where you viewed yourself as inflexible. Look for frequent and consistent themes.
• Actively listen to colleagues and those who work for you even when they disagree with you.
• Be conscious of your words. “No,” “But” and “However” send strong messages that you are uninterested in being open to the ideas of others.
• Shift to a learning perspective. Let others’ good ideas lead you into new territory so that you can learn new approaches.
• Ask yourself: If I were to change just one thing about myself, what would it be? Be open to the answer and begin the process!

Go ahead. Enhance your “FlexAbility”, a key skill for leadership and living. 

To your success,

Mary 

A Delicate Balance

 

“Many a friendship is lost for lack of speaking.”

~Aristotle

 

I just got back from a 360 feedback meeting with a client. Giving feedback can be challenging, especially when some of the feedback is not so positive. But it’s a skill set that I’ve finely tuned in my role as a coach. 

 

In this case my client has many strengths. But he has one significant weakness, and without change, it could be a derailer.

 

One strength in particular is his ability to develop and maintain great relationships with his colleagues and his boss. He has an optimistic, positive attitude and builds trusting and genuine relationships. Always helpful and supportive, he’s a “connector” who is a valuable team mate. Sounds great, doesn’t it?

 

It would be if he was also able to assert himself, to speak up with his own opinions and beliefs even at the risk of others disagreeing. Instead, he acts passively, not engaging in constructive conflict at the risk of others not “liking” him. In meetings, he listens but does not actively contribute to discussions.

 

His lack of assertiveness is seen as a lack of initiative and thus a roadblock to his effective performance and ultimately his promotion opportunities.

 

This situation is not uncommon. In fact, I wrote about it in an earlier post, Top Dog on a Tightrope.

 

Many find it difficult to be assertive. And assertiveness is much misunderstood. People often confuse assertiveness for aggressiveness. And the “nice” ones definitely avoid the aggressive label like the plague, leaning toward being passive.

 

Assertiveness requires a delicate balance. It involves the ability to communicate clearly and unambiguously, while being sensitive to the needs of others.  Being assertive is all about getting at the problem and not the person. It’s about analyzing a situation, determining a reasonable solution that is a win-win for both parties.

 

Assertiveness requires self awareness to be able to recognize your feelings before you express them and self regard to stand up for your own rights and deeply held beliefs. Combine self awareness and self regard with a genuine care and consideration for the thoughts and feelings of others and you have the balance that assertiveness requires.

 

Helping my client build his assertiveness will require him to practice new behaviors, like speaking his opinion in meetings and focusing on positive self talk rather than negative self talk that undermined his self regard. He’ll also look for role models in his team and his Company to model assertiveness.

 

What about you? Do you find it easy or hard to be assertive? What skills do you employ to assertively communicate your opinions and beliefs without stepping on others or having others step on you? How do you keep the delicate balance?

 

To your success,

 

Mary

Strategic Thinking: One Leadership Muscle You Must Build

 

“Strategic thinking is the bridge that links where you are to where you want to be.”

~Robert Maxwell

 

 “What is the “doing,” doing to you?”

 

That was a question that our priest asked during his homily at Mass last Sunday. Hmmm. Well, I’m certain he was after some answers related to high level spiritual and moral issues. But it was a simple question that he asked us to ponder.

 

The next day, that question took on a whole different meaning. I was in a coaching meeting with my client, “Jane,” a CFO who is a classic “doer.” Jane has always focused on the short term to-do list of today rather than on decisions requiring a long term focus and perspective. Her short term attention was getting in the way of her effectiveness as a CFO. Building her strategic thinking muscle was a top coaching priority for her.

 

So over the last month of focused coaching, Jane has realized the answer to the question: “What is the “doing,” doing to you?”

 

She realized that the “doing” was:

• Robbing her staff of the technical development that they needed and deserved
• Robbing her, the CFO, of precious time to sit back and strategize on the best financial decisions for the Company
• Robbing the CEO of a strategic thought partner, who required a colleague who was working  at a level commensurate with her experience and compensation

  

During the last four weeks, as Jane built her strategic thinking muscle, she said no to her staff who consistently wanted her to step in and “fix” a problem without any attempt at finding solutions of their own. (Note: Jane had conditioned them by her previous behavior.) It was tough but she did not relent. She has received feedback from her staff that they feel more competent and empowered because of this shift.

 

She took the time to free her calendar from ineffective meetings that sucked up her time for strategic thinking and reflection. She wanted to be helpful and participate in various meetings but she had to scrutinize her time for its highest and best use.

 

She met with the CEO to discuss her plan for refinancing the Company’s debt into a more favorable program.

 

She finally realized that her focus on short term "doing" was not consistent with her required role as a strategic financial thinker. And a bonus: she likes this new way of being much better.

 

So, what do you think? What is the “doing,” doing to you?

 

To your success,

 

Mary

 

From Staff to Partner

 

I saw Sheryl Crow in concert the other night. She’s an amazing performer. She sang some of her new songs and of course, some of her greatest hits. One of those hits, Every Day is a Winding Road, is one Crow classic that has a permanent spot on my IPod “running tunes” play list.

 

Winding roads are on my mind this week as I get ready for my upcoming webinar: The Road to Partner: Your Compass, Roadmap and Key Milestones on Your Leadership Journey. My webinar is just one of a series included in a virtual offering, From Staff to Partner Summit.

 

You could say in my coaching work with leaders that I’m their roadside assistance. I’ve traveled this road personally as a practicing CPA and firm Partner, and now I coach leaders including CPAs, attorneys and engineers, to achieve their professional goals and aspirations.

 

During my webinar, I’ll share with my Conference attendees:

• the critical qualities and attributes that act as your compass to guide your travels
• the  leadership skills and behaviors you need to master along the way
• the key milestones you can look to as evidence of  success on your journey
• the common potholes and roadblocks you need to watch for

 

I know from experience that the actual route you take to Partner will be as unique and personal as you are. But there are distinct and important transitions that you must make at every turn on your leadership path.

 

What are those transitions? What are the leadership skills and abilities that you will need to master in order to successfully reach your desired destination?  

 

I invite you to join me on August 11^th at noon to learn some key strategies for your journey. And join the rest of the faculty of From Staff to Partner Summit in 3 sixty minute sessions on August 4, 11 and 18.

Every Day IS a Winding Road but there’s a bright future ahead.

 

 

To your success,

Mary